Paul Simon Can't Lose

Timing is everything in life. Roger Clemens served up a 3-run gopherball to the Orioles' Aubrey Huff at about 8:56 EST tonight. Paul Simon was being awarded the Library of Congress' first Gershwin Award on PBS at 9:00 EST. Thanks for not stringing me along Rocket.

Perhaps Simon and Garfunkel were talking about the Yankees set up to Mariano when they sang "Bridge Over Troubled Waters". Of course, Simon's great hit, "Slip Sliding Away" was clearly about this season.

Simon's lyric "where have you gone Joe DiMaggio?" was a reference to the lack of any punch in the Yankees lineup. And "She wore diamonds on the soles of her shoes"- a clear reference to the $200+ million underachieving payroll.

The team is now in a stage of unwatchableness (sic) that has not been seen in about 15 years or so. Well actually, it was just this past May. I would say it's like watching paint dry, but then again sometimes runs do occur during painting.

The Yankees made another pitcher look like Sandy Koufax, Bob Gibson, and well, Roger Clemens all rolled into one. They managed only 5 hits off of Erik Bedard and the beleaguered Orioles pen in a 4-0 loss. For those of you keeping score at home, that's 7 losses in 8 games and 4 in a row- all to sub par teams (although they may be par compared to those fakes in pinstripes).

Roger Clemens struggled his way through 5 innings, making like Houdini a couple of times to keep the game scoreless. But it finally caught up to him in the 6th, Huff's blow the crusher.

Anyone notice that the Red Sox just got swept by the Mariners? Sadly, it doesn't matter.

Will I put on the game tomorrow? Yep, cause I'm "Still crazy after all these years".