Pork Chops and Apple Sauce

Yes, it is a Brady Bunch reference to when Peter was trying to find himself and decided to be Humphrey Bogart reincarnate. It also has to do with last night's Yankees game with the Minnesota Twins.

You probably have heard all about it by now, but in case you haven't, while Javier Vazquez was getting chopped up by the Twins, YES' Kimberly Jones was having her pork chop assaulted. Wait, that sounded really unseamly. More precisely, Kimwas demonstrating a Target Field food item - pork chop on a stick, when a Yankees fan leaned over and took a bite out of the "other white meat" (not Kim's arm). She was disgusted. Announcers Michael Kay and Leiter were disgusted and hysterical all at the same time. And despite Kim's tweet later on that the incident will all be forgotten about when she returns to work next week, the porkchop horror will most certainly live on.

As for the game itself, yeah, that was pretty much a horror show as well. Vazquez reverted back to his pre-Tigers and Mets contests self and was smacked around by the Twins lineup. It didn't help any that the Yankees lineup continued to stagnate. And for a final show stopper, Chad Gaudin marked his return to the Yankees by giving up a 3-run home run to Jason Kubel to put the game completely out of reach.

Vazquez looked uncomfortable most of the night. His fastball continued to be unimpressive and his mechanics and psyche seemed off. He put the Yankees in a 3-0 hole after just two innings and the RISP-less Bronx Bombers, despite 10 hits, couldn't come back.

Robinson Cano did his best to prove otherwise, driving in both Yankees runs with a single in the 4th and double in the 6th. But down 4-2 in the bottom of the 6th, Vazquez allowed a solo home run to Kubel, who was just getting started.

Joe and Mauer and Justin Morneau each reached against the always unreliable Chan Ho Park to start the 7th and two batters later Kubel crushed a Gaudin meatball into the right field seats. Welcome back Chad.

Notes

Some bats are starting to come around a bit. Derek Jeter's two hits last night put him on an 8-18 (.444) streak. Mark Teixeira had his second straight two hit game, though both he and Alex Rodriguez continued to deliver in the big spots.